The information age is rough. It's so hard to know what's true.

For example, how do I know which emails I forward on to ten friends will actually result in good luck versus those that won't? Can that pill really make my penis add on inches? (Inches!) And that deposed Nigerian prince sounds so sincere.

But I don't know… So many people abuse the truth in so many ways and for so many reasons. What to do? What to believe?

It's easy to drop the wise approach of "don't believe everything you hear" and regress into "don't believe anything you hear." Of course, people who claim they don't believe anything always end up believing something. Those who don't believe "The Media" always end up getting their news from some other source that could also easily be categorized as "The Media."

Still, the primal reaction to disbelieve everything is understandable. You're hesitant to take things on faith, and that's wise, but in our specialist-driven society, you have to be able to assess others because you can’t be an expert in all fields.

So the info glut is here to stay, and we can't necessarily assess the truth of something as much as we'd like, but we can easily assess our assessment. We can check our own bias, and check against timeless rules. For example, is this something we want to be true?  Is this too good to be true? Is this so complex I have unanswered questions and some clown is pressuring me to act now? Etc.

That introspection is becoming (or has become) our lone critical tool. Without it, we look ridiculous.

Case in point: climate change deniers. These people could use some serious self-assessment, because the extent of their research into climate change involves a paid shill telling them it doesn’t exist. Now of course I don't know that for certain. It's entirely possible that they consulted more than one paid shill.

Besides, aren't I making a leap of faith that climate change is real? Well, sure. I am. But not all leaps of faith are created equal. I haven't done massive amounts of research into climate change, either. Who can? Scientists can. And when you line up lots of scientists and they believe it, is it wise to doubt them or believe instead the opposite view being pushed by a talking head with a well-known habit of always defending big business?

If climate change deniers are so independently-minded, why haven't they instead started a "Pilots Are Dumb" movement? On any given flight, why aren't there legions of people rushing the cockpit, shoving the pilot aside while screaming, "Get out of here! You don't know what you're doing! I can fly this bird better than you!"

Why haven't the climate change deniers called for the firing of surgeons? Why aren't hordes of talk-radio junkies kicking open the doors to operating rooms, plastic knife in hand, screaming, "Step away from the body! I'll handle this!"

And how dare they claim to "Support the troops!" Surely the troops are criminally incompetent compared to a climate change deniers' renaissance-man-like skill set.

No, they're not doing any of that. That would be absurd to claim they're experts in fields that require such intensive training!

Yet somehow, climate change deniers are experts in climate change.

So let's review: They have no piloting background, but there's no movement to overthrow pilots. No surgery background, no movement to overthrow doctors. No climate change background, yet there's a movement to disregard climate scientists. What a lucky coincidence for the industries that are anti-environmental protection! All without the use of propaganda! (Wink.)

One more example that's great for larfs: when people who don't claim to have studied any biology try to deny evolution, but offer up some insane condition which would allegedly win them over. As in, "I don't believe in evolution and I won't believe it until I see a hamster with wings. If evolution is real, where are all the hamsters with wings? And gravity? Calling B.S. on that! What about Superman? It doesn't affect Superman, so how can you say it's a hard and fast law of physicsology?"

I feel bad for scientists and true independent thinkers. In their naïve honesty, they'll say things like, "Well, we're 99% sure carbon emissions from human activity heat up the globe and screw with the climate." That’s all the opening a fake independent mind needs. "Oh, you're not definitely sure? Well call me back when you are. Until then, go away. I have to gas up my SUV for another three mile drive."

Of course thinking for yourself is a great thing, as long as you sprinkle it with some humility. But that's what the fake independent mind doesn't do. They are confusing independent thought with a mind unanchored. They refuse to believe anything they don't want to that's beyond their own experience. There's no better recipe for ignorance than that.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.

October 15, 2010 is Blog Action Day, when bloggers worldwide all write about a single topic in order to push that topic into the public awareness. This year's topic is water.

When I was looking for a house to buy, a real estate agent told me that when considering property, I should be mindful of water. Will it flood the land? Will it flow naturally through?

After I bought a place, I was discussing basement water-proofing with someone who had done it, via an effort appalling to my work-allergic self. The guy warned me to be ready for a struggle. "Water," he said, "Is a persistent and unstoppable force."

Both comments shared the same core wisdom: Respect Water. If you don't, you'll be sorry. Does water get the respect it deserves? The answer is mixed, but I think leans towards no.

For example, you've probably heard the statistic that water covers 70% of the globe. So why do we call our home Planet Earth? We should rebrand our home Planet Water. If you saw our planet from far away, would you categorize it as earth or water? To call it Earth would be like calling a human being an arm. (My fellow arms, lend me your ears!)

As for me, I'm aware of the water cycle, but what really concerns me is drinkable fresh water. How would I get some if the faucets suddenly stopped? How would I know where to dig a well? What if it all got contaminated? Then what? Ignorance is a form of disrespect. My low freshwater I.Q. tells me I take water for granted.

Before humans had evolved vending machines and faucets, how did our ancient ancestors find fresh water? Did they stand in the rain, staring skyward with their mouths open like a love ballad music video? Maybe before streams were polluted with crap from places that make plastic bottles to put water in, finding drinking water was easy, just stick your hand in a stream and drink. Or, as some might prefer, lean over and lick.

What? Did you think LOL meant something else?

On the positive side, I can say I admire the beauty of water. Having grown up in New Jersey, visits down the shore were spent swimming through murk. You couldn't see more than a few feet. When I visit tropical lands, I always find it fascinating that I can see my toes through several feet of water. That's how an ocean should be.

But what's beautiful and what's good to put your tongue in are two different things. (What? Those double-entendres are in YOUR head, not MY writing!)

Only once in my entire life can I remember actually going up to a stream and drinking from it. I was hiking in a mountain forest. It was a wonderful, beautiful, spiritual moment, where I felt like I communed with nature and the universe. Sadly, that brief event was followed by a week of angst that I had swallowed some invisible carcinogen.

Another thing that terrifies me about water is the idea of the polar ice caps melting. Two continent-sized water balloons are just waiting to pop and drown us all.

So let's review. Water owns over half our planet and it's got reserves in the polar ice caps. It's an unstoppable force that's easily contaminated. Oh and only a very small portion of it is drinkable, but that tiny portion is essential to our lives.

When this year's Blog Action Day topic was announced, my first thought was, "Water? That sucks! How can I make that interesting? It's water. Who cares?" However, after reviewing here the many ways in which I'm hydrologically ignorant, it turns out water was a perfect candidate for an awareness campaign.

Sometimes it seems we arms (I mean, we humans) can't come together over anything. If there's one thing we should really try to achieve, I think we should start with giving water the respect it deserves. We have to work together because water is collective, always. There is no individual ownership, much as those motivated by money try. Water moves, expands, evaporates, flows. If you mess up one part, it will contaminate the rest.

We've got to give water respect. One way or another, sooner or later, it will demand it. Let's make it sooner, because once water is no longer drinkable, we won't ever be able to LOL again.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.

Following any huge snowstorm, two things are predictable. One, the media will remind you not to go anywhere (like you could under a couple feet of snow.) Two, many people will seriously claim to have found startling new evidence that global warming doesn't exist. This new discovery called "ice" apparently eluded scientists for several centuries, but now that it's been found, well, just forget all that climate change talk.

Okay, that's enough mocking of climate change deniers. We should show compassion. Deniers aren't just drones suddenly claiming to be scientific geniuses because they worship a talking head funded by the invisible hand of industry. They're people, too. And they're hurting.

Just like a denier bringing scientific consensus to a halt with a single ice cube, I can prove it. Ever since the world-wide discussion on the problem of climate change began, the denial movement has transitioned exactly through the five stages of grief:

1. Denial (There's no climate change happening!)
2. Anger (Climate change is a liberal myth!)
3. Bargaining (Okay, maybe it's real, but we can't address it now.)
4. Depression (A global consensus of scientists say it's real? Crap, I might have to get off the couch.)
5. Acceptance (Okay, fine! Wait! If there's nothing we can do about it, why get off the couch?)

Notice how the Acceptance phase transitions seamlessly into rationalization: I'll accept climate change exists IF YOU PROMISE to tell me the situation is hopeless. This is a primal response at the core of human nature and the source of a climate change denier's pain. We all instinctively know that acknowledging a problem means there will probably be some kind of work involved afterwards.

Being humans, all sides of the debate see the it's-hopeless-so-do-nothing angle as a tempting offer, so our minds move in quickly to close the sale: Is climate change really that bad? If the roof is still standing and the house isn't on fire and American Idol is still on, can we honestly say there is a problem? Heck! Climate change might even work in our favor. If the earth heats up and the sea rises, that increases the chance that you'll own beachfront property. Why not roll the dice? Maybe during the scrambling of the earth's climate zones, the band of scorching temperatures at the equator will widen, and the Caribbean will come to you.

Surfing while on the couch! Literally!

The climate change denial dynamic reminds me of veteran home-owning couples. If you are one, this exchange will sound familiar: Look, there's a hole in the wall. It's not that bad. Fix it! No! If you don't fix it, I'm not going to your dumb movie. Aw, but it's a Saturday! All right, I'll fix it. Wait, why not think of it as a free window?

When discussing climate change, we're not just fighting knee-jerk contrarians and considering fair questions from independent thinkers, we're struggling against human nature itself. That's a double bummer because even if stopping the effects of global warming is impossible, just by trying to clean up the environment, we'd accomplish lots of good. Surely there are worse fates.

Human nature's work here is almost done. Having successfully rationalized us away from any effort, or acknowledgment of error, it's time to apply the finishing move that concludes all human activity: the spin. So here we go: When it comes to global warming, we're not fiddling while Rome burns, we're just not afraid of change!

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.

Karma knows no mercy.

Like any force of nature, there is no reasoning with it. Karma acts upon you and you can't fight it or make it let up any more than you can beg gravity to cut you a break when you're about to fall on your ass. 

Many times I've witnessed karmic punishment bearing down on people, and even though they fully deserve it, a tiny part of my soft heart feels sorry for them. I would make a horrible cop. "You say this is the first time you've ever done drugs? Well, okay then, but next time, I mean it, you're going to be in big trouble!"

I began this rambling meditation on karma while I was sitting at a flea market, failing to rid myself of my junk, wondering what I had done to deserve such mind-crushing boredom. I didn't care how much money I made, all I wanted was to move the stuff on to someone else and delay its ultimate destiny in a landfill, helping pollute our planet.

The whole flea market experience was painful. Preparing my wares for sale was a total drag. I had to pack everything up neatly, load it into the car then unload it onto the grass. Then I had to sit there and wait. And wait. I suppose I could have just left the junk there, but that would be irresponsible. I had created the demand, I wanted to complete the cycle and feed back into the supply.

After several hours of wasting a beautiful day, barely anything sold, and then it was time to pack up all the crap, stuff it in the car and unload it back into my house where it takes up room, doing nothing to this very moment.

Personified karma was laughing in my face! "You wanted this stuff, sucka! Here you go! Enjoy! Take more! Now you can't get rid of it! Mwaa ha ha!" Karma is apparently passive-aggressive and sounds vaguely like a gangsta rapper.

But I meant no harm! Did I really deserve karma's wrath just because I went through a Pez-dispenser collection phase? Or thought a Fitness Flyer really was a deal too good to be true? Or was impressed with the many uses of the Snuggie? Those damn infomercial people seemed so happy, I had to join in. Yet the happiness wore off quickly and all I want now is to get rid of these things, but no one wants them! So they take up space and linger. Woe to me!

I wonder if there would be any environmental problems if we were all damned by The Flea Market Curse.

The good news is, we are. The bad news is we live like we aren't. Most people throw stuff in the trash and never question how it miraculously vanishes. Meanwhile, a landfill nearby is reaching capacity, polluting their drinking water, sending back karmic retribution in a chain of events so obscure no one could possibly trace them all. Then when our water and/or land is polluted we cry, "Why has god (or fate) done this to us?" We never dare to consider blaming ourselves, even in part. None dare call it karma.

The Flea Market Curse teaches us to think in reverse. Want to stop hazardous input? Prevent output. Want to make people buy less junk? Forbid them to throw out what they buy. Want people to use less water? Let their drainage run only once a week. Want people to use less gas? Reroute exhaust pipes into the car. Want them to stop eating so much? Sew their buttholes shut. And so on.

Too extreme? Maybe, but it's all food for thought. Better we brainstorm now rather than later, because no one escapes karma.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.

Today, October 15, 2009 is Blog Action Day 2009. The topic is Climate Change. My entry follows.

Suppose you're on a luxury cruise ship (with no lifeboats) a thousand miles from anywhere.

While you're sipping your martini and sunbathing, an announcement blares over the loudspeaker. "This is your captain speaking. We've got a leak in the ship. We're all going to drown unless we get to the bottom deck and start hauling out the water as fast as it comes in. We need everyone's help!"

Being a sane, smart, non-suicidal person, you race to help, screaming for everyone else to do the same. On the way, you pass a batch of people still sunbathing. "Didn't you hear the captain?" you ask, liberally sprinkling your question with profanities too vile for this family-friendly blog.

They laugh at you. "That captain is full of crap. This ship isn't sinking."

What would you do? You could call them more vile profanities, but they are essential to your survival, so you'd want to use every manner of persuasion to get their help. You could kick them overboard so the ship had less to hold up, but that would waste time, which, according to the captain, is running out.

That's the challenge of Climate Change as allegory. Let's extract the meaning.

The captain represents the expert scientists who tell everyone there is a problem. You (starring as yourself) being sane, smart and non-suicidal, conclude the captain is an expert and knows what he's talking about. After all, you trust him to pilot the ship while you sleep, get drunk, watch bad dinner theater and marinate your privates in a hot tub alongside complete strangers and their privates. You're living every day with a trust that the skipper knows his stuff. It would be absurd to suddenly doubt his ability to judge the vessel's seaworthiness.

The arrogant deniers in the story represent, well, arrogant deniers.

I know, I know. We should respect others' opinions, but science isn't a question of preference or taste. Acknowledging Climate Change is a matter of everyone believing the experts that they rely on for everything else in their lives (scientists) from car safety to medicine to food production to whether or not a container labeled "microwave-safe" really is, on and on and on.

Can we please give scientists priority on matters of science?

Back in the day, I read science magazines a lot. I still do, though not as much. Back then (and now) all the science magazines spoke about global warming as a fact. The popular news didn't speak of it a peep. That changed when Al Gore hit the scene with An Inconvenient Truth and raised the alarm on Climate Change. Suddenly all the political (non-scientist) opponents of Mr. Gore, who have never ever discussed science in any depth, are speaking like Doctorates of Meteorology, claiming with absolute certainty that Climate Change is a hoax. I believe their dislike (or jealousy) of Al Gore has clouded their judgment.

This is what is so terrifying about Climate Change. We need everyone's participation to reverse, slow or mitigate its effects, but some people just can't stand the fact that Al Gore was the messenger. That's one psychological breakdown of Climate Change denial, but there are alternate explanations.

For example, the denial might be rooted in a disconnection with the earth and a lack of understanding of its connectedness. It's hard for short-sighted people who have never poked their heads beyond the confines of their own asses to worry about Climate Change. So what if an iceberg melts? They say. It doesn't affect my water supply. Who cares if honeybees die? I can always just go the store and get food.

Wouldn't it be great if someone wrote a book about this Earth-ignorant psychosis and titled it Where Did This Come From?

Whatever the reason for the denial, we need to overpower it. We all must appreciate the planet's fragility and act to protect it. Sadly, chucking deniers off the planet isn't possible, and we could use their help confronting global warming meaningfully.

Deniers, if Climate Change doesn't (at least to your perception) directly affect you now, it will. Look at it this way: if the planet floods and the atmosphere cooks, you won't be able to claim the moon landing was a hoax, or that Obama was born in Kenya, or that putting profit above health is a splendid idea, or hate liberal tree-huggers like me. You won't be able to do jack, because we'll all be dead. So can't we agree on this ONE thing, please? You can still hate me, just PLEASE stop denying Climate Change and work toward eliminating it with what you eat, what you drive and who you vote for.

That might go down in history as the most bizarre sales pitch ever, but in keeping with our nautical theme, I say "any port in a storm" because we need "all hands on deck."

A cruise ship without lifeboats may seem strange or contrived for the point of the fable, but I disagree. It's a perfect description for our one and only planet.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.