Nazis Always Think They're Fighting the Nazis (or, It's a slippery slope from free prostate exams to mandatory gas chambers)

Say what you want about President Obama, but he has done one thing very well. He has altered our national discussion. The big question of his term is: how to improve health care? What a refreshing change from the big question of the Bush years: how can we funnel even more money to the rich? Change has come! Instead of screwing up the entire planet, we've graduated to screwing ourselves.

Apparently change upsets a lot of people. This past summer, the usual round of breaking news (it's hot, it's really hot, it's not that hot) was completely pushed aside by footage from town hall meetings and demonstrations. Americans turned out in large numbers to let their opinions about Obama and his healthcare plan be known. This made for some disturbing video clips. (Like this, this, and this.)

Before you get discouraged by this ugliness, look on the bright side. The mayhem at the town halls proves we have at least a partly-functioning democracy. People are free to stand up in public and present views opposed to our country's leaders, opposed to the nation's majority and even opposed to any possible reality.

It's that last group I want to focus on, that cluster of people who see a national health care program as the sole intermediate step between where America is now and late-1930's Nazi Germany. If how a country makes a seamless transition from free prostate exams to mandatory gas chambers is a mystery to you, chances are you're sane. Or, according to supporters of the thesis, you've been duped.

Human history sadly never lacks stories of genocide, but for some reason the Nazi reign sticks in the American mind. Can a brother get an update? Nazis are so old-school. They've been replaced by Commies, then Russian Commies, then Warlords, then Terrorists. Official enemies come and go, but America's favorite bad guy remains the Nazis.

Maybe it's due to the perplexing question of how Nazi Germany came to exist at all. How did it happen? How did a country famous for something as harmless as beer and ridiculous as lederhosen become the most murderous, destructive force the world has ever seen not counting Wal-Mart?

I think the Obama-is-evil crazies provide the answer. See, everything happens for a reason, even nutty people showing up in public. Whackos have their uses, I guess.

Let me explain. What cracks me up, in a we're-all-doomed-so-laugh-or-you'll-cry kind of way, is that the people who scream Nazi the loudest, who call people Nazis the most, are also the people who act most similar to the Nazis, or are at least the most ready to become American neo-Nazis. Let's call them Americanazis and compare.

The original Nazis believed without question the fact-free ravings of a leader with access to major media, perpetual rage, and dubious sanity. Americanazis do too (Beck, O'Reilly, Limbaugh). The original Nazis believed the big lie: Jews were taking over, and if you didn't see evidence of it, it's because they were so skilled at hiding their schemes. The Americanazis believe Obama's healthcare plan and his every action (talking to schoolkids, planting a garden, playing basketball, etc.) are secret plans of evil and if it seems to your observation to be otherwise, that's because he is so skilled at hiding his nefariousness. Nazis were told they were under attack and they believed it (as explained by Goering in his famous quote on how to start a war). Americanazis are told they are oppressed and under attack, and they believe it as well. Reference the ludicrous War on Christmas and the perpetual warnings against liberals, education, the media, political correctness, as well as many other dastardly abstract nouns.

So maybe all of that can be overlooked, but what makes Americanazis prime candidates as Nazi re-enactors is their disturbing sexual attraction to firearms. That completes the Nazi package: crazy leaders, gullibility, anger, paranoia and guns.

How did Nazi Germany arise? There were some key angry cult-leaders stoking a bunch of scared and willing-to-put-anger-before-thought believers. Before long, people are committing horrible evil acts because they are convinced they are doing so against horrible evil people.

Nazis always think they're fighting the Nazis. It's the eternal wisdom of "whoever smelt it dealt it" scaled to address the psychoses of the terrified, gullible, angry, armed, hate-prone demographic.

Nazis always think they're fighting the Nazis. Prove me wrong. When you fail, you know what to call me.

UPDATE: Mere seconds before I posted this, I ran across this disturbing story: Right-Wing Conference Tells Activists To Get Their Guns Ready For ‘Bloody Battle’ With Obama The Nazi (link) which neatly proves my point. The Winner of the "Most Likely To Be The Next Nazis" award is... the gang accusing others of being Nazis.

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Larry Nocella writes The Semi-True Adventures of Lar blog at LarryNocella.com. He's the author of the novel Where Did This Come From? The world's first CarbonFree(R) novel according to Carbonfund.org. The book is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers.

Blah-Vroom-Blah! versus Sympathy For the Teabaggers (or, Finding the Best Servants)

Lately I've been making more of an effort to understand those I disagree with. I'm desperately seeking opinions different than mine instead of digesting the same old media that reinforces my thoughts. I already know what I think and while insecure in some ways, I don't need to constantly be told I'm right (just that I'm beautiful.)

I think of my opinions like a champion boxer who cannot retire. He stays on top only as long as he defeats all contenders, and he must face every challenger.

Results of my quest have been mixed.

I've tried to engage people on the internet, and by "engage" I mean call them morons and get called worse. Strangely, this has not led to the thoughtful exchange I had hoped for.

Fortunately, shortly after embarking on this venture, an opportunity arose. I refer to the recent Tea Bag Parties held on Tax Day.

Having taken part in demonstrations before (mostly on behalf of animal rights) I felt kinship with the teabaggers. I knew what they were up against, even though they had Astroturf backing. If you've never taken to the streets, let me review the weird obstacles that arise when partaking in a protest.

It's not as easy as it sounds. Sure, you stand there with a sign and/or march, but it's often boring (that's one challenge) the weather isn't always friendly, and you even might get nervous, as from stage fright or public speaking.

Then there's the taunting. Knuckleheads driving by are quick to execute what I call the blah-vroom-blah. They disagree with you (judging by their hand gestures) and they scream their discontent without ever slowing down as they whip past. What they yell is invariably lost to the wind, their vehicle's engine and the Doppler effect. Apparently, to some, an exchange of ideas is best handled like fast food: quick and lousy. Thanks to the net, protest taunting options are multiplied. Now you can mock the protestors in lots of new creative ways before, during, and forever after, in multimedia. (True confession: I did some mocking on Twitter.)

Of course, the biggest challenge following a demo is getting your message(s) into the mainstream media (MSM). Sadly, most analyses from the MSM were echoes of the same crap I heard following my animal rights adventures. Some cliches: What is the message? The message just isn't clear. They need a leader. They need a single voice. What are they protesting? What are they doing out there?

I've always felt that you need to be careful not to assess the value of a message based on the skill of the messenger at presenting it. Imagine a genius with a speech impediment. His presentation is incomprehensible, but his ideas are awesome.

Yet that poor genius would be mocked by the MSM because of the snotty way pundits of all stripes assess demonstrations. If the demo isn't executed in an easy-to-report fashion, with a ready-made single message and choreographed dance numbers, they whine. As if it's even possible to gather hundreds of people in one location and have them all sing the same tune with one voice.

The MSM has not learned or perhaps simply can't cover this important facet of America. News is made for single simple messages that fit into defined areas, but with America speaking so diversely, reporting usually falls short. Though it may be true that the protest is disorganized, we need to note that inadequate reporting methods may be a bigger part of the problem.

So let's listen to the teabaggers. They are angry about taxes, angry about bank bailouts, worried about how all Obama's spending will affect future generations. These are all legit concerns. I applaud them taking it to the streets. I like to think a big demo frightens would-be dictators.

Sadly, though, they don't, and that's where I part ways with the teabaggers. I understand they are concerned, but when the Bush-Cheney Criminal Cartel was selling out America for generations in ways financial, legal and moral, teabaggers did nothing. It was only when Fox News whipped them up about Obama that they mobilized. This is disappointing.

Obama's team has repeated endlessly that anyone making less than a quarter-mil per year will see a tax decrease. Yes, Obama is spending, but he has explained his method to pay for it: tax the rich, which the general teabagger seems to also oppose.

How odd! These rugged individualist types practically have a waking wet dream while talking about making their final hopeless stand against a much larger, much more well-armed foe (always the government or some arm thereof.) Yet the same people are always willing to live at the whim of the rich. I say tax the greedy bastards!

That's the teabagger paradox: they fight against their own interests, for free, on behalf of the rich who would steal their life savings and screw them and their families in a second. The best servant is a willing one.

So even with the impossibility of adequate media coverage, can a protest accomplish anything? Well sure, it shows that people are angry enough to get out in public. For that, I commend the teabaggers. As for their no-taxes-for-the-rich stance, I'm afraid when it comes to that, I'm just going to have to say they can suck my balls.

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Larry Nocella's novel Where Did This Come From? is available on Amazon.com as a paperback and Kindle eBook. It is also available for other eBook readers. For more info, visit LarryNocella.com.